WhenDysoncalled to tell me we were doing an episode on 2D shooters, I had to check my calendar. My birthday isn’t until May, and Christmas was weeks ago, so I was a bit confused. What had I done to deserve such a fantastic gift? At that moment, the heavens opened as angels sung the hymn of danmaku and my world was filled with resplendent color and light. Spring had come early. Cherry blossoms danced softly in the breeze, birds began chirping, brooks bubbled and splashed to life, flowers sprung from the ground in all directions. Then he said it was becauseOmega Fivecame out this week.

Oh. Well, whatever.

Anyone wholistensto our show knowshow i feelaboutshmups, so there exists the possibility that this episode will consist mostly of me yapping about Japan-only Saturn titles and trying to hold back orgasms for an hour. As such, I have been fitted with a high-voltage “correctional collar” to ensure that the other cast members are allowed to speak. While I try to coax Chad into telling me which one of them has the remote for this thing, hit the comments with your questions.

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